Vagabonding

One week. The bosses tactfully informed. The Parisian company confirmed. The last true voyage of 2007. Another return to the marvelous Thames. The smile perpetual. One week.

Is there anything more enjoyable than booking accommodations in far off climes online? I have just confirmed a few nights at the Bahaus Guesthouse in Istanbul. The terms and conditions of the stay absolutely delightful (favorite comments in bold):

THE CONDITIONS OF STAYING IN BAHAUS GUESTHOUSE
1- There is an age limit . Under 14 years old and over 50 years old are not able to stay.
2-You are not allowed to bring food and drink in our Bar-Restaurant-Cafeteria lounge.
3- In case of delay to your original arrival time, we can only keep the bed or room another 4 more hour. After that we reserve our right to sell the bed or rooms to someone else unless you let us know by email, fax or calling.
4- We prefer the amount of payment due to be paid in cash (Euro, Dollar, Pound or Türkish lira). We charge 5% commision on credit card payments.
5- You can not go around topless or naked in the Hostel. You cannot sleep naked in dorm rooms.
6- We do not allow local friends that you meet in the city to use our facilities (Bar-Restaurant-Laundry- Internet ext...)
7- We do not make any discount to anyone. Do not ask for that.
8- We have a no refund policy.
9- We can store your luggage up to 3 days for free. More than that we charge 2€ per day.
10- In case you forget or lose things, we do not accept any responsibility and cannot post any of the items back to you.
11- We do not let anyone scream, shout or be abusive. We do not let anyone become filthy drunk and bother other customers.
12-We do not let our female customers be bothered or hassled if they do not wish it.
13- You cannot wash your clothes in the bathrooms.
14- If you leave your personal things in the common bathrooms for a long time, we reserve our right to throw them away.
15- You cannot use our technical equipment or any other hostel belongings without our permission.
16- You cannot use, touch or sleep in another persons bed in the dormitories.
17- We request you to be respectful and thoughtful of other guests by being as quiet as possible after midnight.
18- We do not accept the local customer.

Oh, you seductive open road.