The Native Hue of Resolutions

Ah, yes. So it is that time again - year end. And this time trying, in its final moments, to fill out the time as to finalize the case for the maximum feasible bonus. Shameless, but there you have the priorities. Just be sure to follow through on what's unrecorded on the 2nd.

It is day 364 of the year, an opportunity to get a bit nostalgic as well. Looking back through previous postings on the eves/morns of 2006, 07, 08, 09, and 10, it is hard not to smile. 'Tis the reason why keeping track of such instant thoughts and feelings is so worthwhile - the way it seems to freeze time and memories even as they normally prove so fleeting.

It is also a day for resolutions, which have been building in the mind in the last month. Not that these will be easy ones to keep, but perhaps there is value at least in writing them down (or so saith the Mail). Struck out mostly in 2006 when the list was longer, but the more recent resolutions have seen better luck - South America and Africa both touched in 2008, the Camino conquered in 2009, and - though not expressly said - the ancient loan paid down faster than expected through the year now gone. Not a year of many posts, but those that did register (which I've just skimmed anew) remain timely reminders and add colour to the long road taken to arrive at this point. You owe the bank nothing, McMahon. That's an accomplishment worth repeating.

Which opens up possibilities for the year upcoming, of course. First, let's put two straight-forward goals for the first half (before the 6th tape on the 32nd) on the table: the marathon, and the novel. Ambitious, to be sure, but doable, especially as a decent enough start has already been made on each. I like the boldness.

That leaves the second-half, larger and more "impactful". Much may depend on how any February travel plans get divvied up, with the possibility of starting something new in Cuba versus a return to Europe to atone for past mistakes. January planning should be most interesting in this regard, I would think.

Regardless of how that plays out, though, the city looming largest, as long foretold, must be London. As Ms. Oliva so sweetly puts it in the email exchange of just today, "Will you travel in 2011? unbelievable! ahahah! You are a really traveller, always walking around the world (I'm so jealous!!). It's a very good thing if you go to life in London". I so agree, and couldn't express it any better girl. Walking around the world indeed, and what better home than the capital. Whether it is to serve as a base for wandering further afield, hopefully as far as Yang, and/or just to refresh the career in general, there is a sense that the first part of '11 is sure to be spent in exploration and consideration of options back to the magical Thames. In some real ways, my head is already there - the when and the where the more intriguing questions.

Well, that is all. A merry new year (come and gone) to ye. 2011 to be an epic one, grander still than 2009? Here's hoping. Or further, here's to fucking just making it happen. Champagne toasts tonight to a' that. And may good luck go with thee.

"Quantity of the Oblivion"

Now he wanted the most comfortable bed that could be had, and a woman, preferably one without a mustache, and finally a quantity of the oblivion, the escape from self, that can never be found in a woman’s arms but only in good strong drink.

- Rushdie, Enchantress of Florence

Sweet words, most excellently written, and true. A long weekend of recovering, but now a few days into the last full week of the 2010 working year and the tasks have almost been completed as ever. Still need to finalize the marking, but so that always goes. This weekend perhaps? Or something to while away the time over the break. What matter?

Seems sometimes like the next seeking out of oblivion is a long time into the future until it comes. We shall see. Just get through this week and mark the hours and defeat boredom in its glory, and then let the organizing of the office, room, possessions, and the mind all begin to sort themselves out as you continue anew down that long road to freedom.

The days and nights do grow shorter, and thanks be for that.

Beguiling

My spirits grow dull, and fain I would beguile

The tedious day with sleep.

[Player King to Player Queen in Hamlet III:2]

Another Christmas party anon. Early talks setting up the investor account, and good talk with K. about the state of things there as well. Some time to breathe seems good medicine, and important to know of her unforgiven/unforgotten thoughts on your petty reactions to the seriousness of violations down in Peru. Clarity will come with time, I think. In the interim, funny I thought I had mentioned earlier the recent notable Wednesday eve that suggests other new year possibilities worth considering. And even if that email goes forever unanswered, as other messages in other directions before it, there shall be other avenues, surely.

The time is short on this posting as you wait any moment for a call that the car is downstairs for the trip to see the Greek and other cranks. But worth noting the other phone meeting of the day on depreciation, (followed by the interruption about the lack of formulae in the AA compliance) which leaves you only ever more convinced that these are not the types of issues you want to be concerning yourself year after year. How things shake out in the end for 2011 will be entertaining to watch. It should be a year of less planning and more spontaneity. Unlike the eve of 2009, when that change was more uncertain but became very predictable in its conception by the time of initial departure, this time I think it is likely that there shall be more one-way tickets and less fixed ideas.

As for tonight, then, perhaps the last of the parties out of this office that have been entertaining and marked various states of disillusionment, despair, and hilarity. Sweet, leave me here awhile, to make just enough to send me on my way. But no longer. Perhaps an update later, perhaps not. We shall see what merriment and foolishness is to be revealed...